“Billy, nine o’clock—time for bed,” my mom called out.
“Come on, Mom. Can’t I stay up till ten? It’s the last day of school.”
“Nine-thirty,” she said. “I can’t believe you’re finishing fifth grade. Soon you’ll be a middle schooler.”
I heard her sniffle upstairs.
Ugh. Just because I’m the youngest doesn’t mean we have to make it a whole thing.
It was my last day of school, and I was going to be stuck at the same crappy, boring day camp while all my friends were having more fun—hockey camp, Disney cruises, Aruba.
It stinks being the youngest of three. My brother and sister are both in college, so I have to suffer with hand-me-downs and boring summer vacations while my parents pay for their tuition.
At eleven years old, I’m seven years younger than my sister. I know what you’re thinking—yep, I’m the oops of the family. And the oops was always second fiddle. I guess it could be worse, but all I ask for is one fun summer vacation. Nothing too fancy—maybe a safari, mountain climbing, you know, stuff like that.
I put my pajamas on and laid out my clothes for tomorrow. I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. School was going to be all about hearing what fun things my friends were going to do. I got into bed and finally closed my eyes.
I woke to the sound of my mother knocking on my door. “Wake up, sleepyhead. Time for your last day of fifth grade.”
I dragged myself out of bed, my eyes caked with sleepies. Shuffling to the bathroom to brush my teeth and take a shower felt like it took an eternity. From the bathroom, I could smell my mom making my favorite breakfast—pancakes. The aroma hit my nostrils, and I think I actually salivated while I brushed my teeth.
Once I finished getting dressed, I headed to the kitchen. “Mmm, thanks, Mom—my favorite. Do we have any raspberry jam?” I asked.
“Of course we do, sweetheart.” She walked over with a fresh jar. “Here you go.”
I took my knife and spread a heap of jam onto my pancakes. “Thesarsogoo.”
“Don’t talk with your mouth full. Chew, swallow, then speak.”
I swallowed. “These are so good. Light, fluffy, and delicious.” I stuffed more into my mouth.
My mom walked over and kissed my forehead. “Thank you, sweetheart. Now finish up and get to school.”
On my walk to school, I met up with Johnny and Sal. “Hey, guys.”
“Hey, Billy,” Sal replied. “Last day of school. I’m so excited—my family is going to Italy to visit family, and I can’t wait to eat all that good food.”
Sal was Italian, loved to eat, and his body showed it. He might not have been the most physically gifted of our friends, but he was the funniest—and could he eat.
“That’s cool. When do you leave?” I asked halfheartedly.
“Sunday morning flight,” he said, licking his chops.
“What about you, Johnny?”
“Well, I definitely won’t be eating as much as Sal”—who happened to be stuffing a donut in his mouth, and I could smell the sugar from over here—“but I’ll be going to hockey camp for a month, and then my family is going to Disney World. What about you?”
I hesitated, staring at the ground. “Same old boring day camp.”
“It can’t be that bad,” Johnny said.
“It is.” I kept my head down as we continued walking.
“Well, we’ll have some time to get together during the summer.”
“If my mom lets me skip a day at camp, yeah.”
We arrived at school, and the festivities were all about talking about everyone’s summer vacations. I sat there daydreaming of safaris. Wouldn’t it be cool if I got to ride a rhino? That would be awesome.
The final bell of fifth grade rang, bringing me out of my nice little vacation in my head. Johnny, Sal, and I headed outside. Sal was still eating something when we heard screams coming from the schoolyard.
You wouldn’t believe what was there: a white rhino with a horn that had to be two feet long. I just stood there while everyone panicked. I saw teachers on their cell phones—probably calling the cops—while others were taking video of it.
It was standing there and not bothering anyone, so I decided to walk up to it. Johnny was yelling at me. Even Sal put his food down. “Billy, what are you doing? Stay away from that thing!”
But I couldn’t help myself. I wanted an adventure so much I was willing to risk my life. Once I was in front of the rhino, it tilted its head toward its back. I could’ve sworn it was beckoning me on. So I did. I needed help getting up, though, so the rhino turned its head toward me and let me use its horn to climb up. His hide was pretty rough, but I didn’t care.
Johnny and Sal were screaming at me. “Billy, get off that thing!”
I shouted back, “No—come join me. Let’s go for a ride.” They shook their heads.
“Okay, tell my mother I’ll be home late. I’m going for a ride.”
The white rhino waited for me to settle on its back. Everyone from school was staring at me, waiting to see if the thing devoured me.
The next thing I knew, it jumped into the air, and when we landed, we were in the grasslands—or a prairie of some sort.
“Holy moly!” I yelled. “You’re a magic rhino.” I couldn’t believe it. Here we were, in the middle of South Africa. I could see all kinds of animals.
I decided to name the rhino Bob, after my brother. He was as pale as my brother, and my brother’s nose was probably as big as the rhino’s horn. Okay, maybe I’m exaggerating a little.
We roamed the grasslands, walking close to giraffes and mingling among them. A baby giraffe was very interested in putting its face right in front of mine. Scratching behind its ears didn’t cause the same reaction a dog has when you scratch theirs. It looked like it wanted to play, so I was about to jump off Bob when he turned his head and shook it.
“What’s the matter, Bob?”
He pointed his horn off to the right, and I saw what he meant. There was a pride of lions nearby, and they’d love nothing more than to have a Billy snack before dinner.
The giraffe saw I wasn’t getting off, so it leaned in and licked my face with its purple tongue.
“Slurp.” Ugh. Its tongue was rough, and its breath smelled like month-old rotten lettuce. On top of that, I’d just gotten a giraffe bath. What I wouldn’t do for a shower.
I was hungry, thirsty, and getting a little tired, so I asked, “Hey, Bob, is there anything for me to eat and drink around here? Also… where am I going to sleep?”
Bob turned his head around and looked at me. Don’t ask me why, but he seemed to understand me. We walked over to an area with shade trees—which was good, because I forgot to bring sunblock—and he started digging with his feet and horn. Before I knew it, he must have hit a spring, because water was shooting up. He jerked his head toward the water, telling me it was safe to get off and drink.
It felt like drinking out of a water fountain. I drank and washed my face of giraffe drool, splashing cool water over my head. I thought about my friends. They would have loved this, and I couldn’t wait to tell them about it.
While I was drinking, Bob dug up some plants and brought them over to me. They kind of looked like carrots, so I rinsed them off with the fountain, then had myself a vegetarian feast. Well, Bob was a vegetarian anyway.
When I was done, some monkeys, zebras, and a few other animals came over and drank from Bob’s fountain. When they were finished, he stomped on it and it was gone. This was so awesome.
Bob beckoned me up a tree by the fountain, and some monkeys helped me climb farther—to a little shelf of branches. They didn’t smell too good, but I was tired. I watched Bob plop down next to the tree. He was acting as the protector, which was okay by me, with that pride over there eyeing me like an hors d’oeuvre.
Bob was the boss, and I was getting to see a real safari happen. Unfortunately, there’s a lot of violence on a safari, but that’s nature doing its thing. Still, it was fun seeing how life went on outside of my boring day camp. I sure hoped my family was okay—and that Johnny told them where I went.
I’d tell them when I got home, and the best part was, it didn’t cost my parents anything. I saw a lot of life, and I wasn’t too afraid with Bob showing me around. Each night, we came back to the sleeping tree, as I started to call it, and the monkeys slept with me.
One morning, Bob carried me across the grasslands. The air was dry and extremely hot, and my mouth felt like it was glued shut.
Around the fifth night, time got a little fuzzy on this trip. The monkeys made me a crown from twigs. It was crazy how they knew how to weave them into a crown shape. Unfortunately, it stunk like monkey and jabbed me in the head in a few places. I still felt like the king of the jungle. No—not that king, but a prince of some sort. I wasn’t the youngest, and I wasn’t the oops. I was respected.
With the crown on my head, I noticed the pride taking too much interest in me. They were getting a little too close for my liking. Bob started running straight for them, and I yelled, “Bob, what are you doing?”
Fear took over. Sweat dripped down my face the closer we got, and it seemed to take forever. I turned my head just before we crashed into the pride, sure I was dead—then Bob jumped. When he landed, we were in a different part of the world.
This was a jungle with a beautiful river. I was shocked. I was in Brazil, I think. Who knew that white rhinos traveled to Brazil? The wildlife here was much different than South Africa.
I got to see jaguars hunt. Now those guys are really cool. Bob had me watching from the opposite shore. He was very wary of them and must’ve had a bad experience. Hopefully no one was eaten. Bob is a great guide, and I wondered if he’d taken others like this.
A couple of otters swam up to me, got out of the river, and handed me a fish. I thought that was very nice of them, but I wasn’t into raw fish. They went back into the river and stared at me, and I didn’t want to seem ungrateful. I had to take a bite. Blah, I thought, and finally sucked it up and bit down.
My eyes opened wide as I swallowed. “Hey, it’s not too bad. Thanks,” I said to the otters. They did flips in the water and splashed Bob and me. There must be some relation to Dr. Dolittle in my family, because I found myself talking to the animals. Well, at least the friendlier ones.
Just like in Africa, when it was time to sleep, Bob took me to a nearby tree. There were a lot more to choose from, and I slept with the monkeys again. A different species of monkeys, but just as fun. They treated me like royalty, and I figured it was because I still had my crown on.
I don’t remember how long I was on this trip, but I saw lots of things on my adventure with Bob. We must’ve visited half a dozen different places and experienced several different habitats.
Every time Bob jumped, we were somewhere else. Truly an adventure of a lifetime—and my only wish was that Johnny and Sal would’ve joined me. Although, I don’t think Bob would be able to find enough food for Sal, so I guess it’s okay if he went to Italy instead.
The last jump was at night. Bob landed right in front of my house. I didn’t know what time it was, but it was late, and I hoped the door was open because I didn’t have a key.
Lucky me—the door was open. I walked quietly up to my room so I wouldn’t wake anyone. I placed my crown on my dresser, brushed my teeth, and rinsed off, figuring I’d take a shower in the morning. Although I really should tonight, because I smell like an unbathed monkey. Well, that’s what happens when you live with them for a while. My bed felt really comfortable, especially since I’d been sleeping on branches for what felt like two months. I lost track of time and hoped I hadn’t missed the first day of middle school.
I fell asleep quickly because I was exhausted. I couldn’t wait to share my adventures with Johnny and Sal.
I woke up, my eyes all crusted with sleepies, and the smell of my mom’s pancakes wafted into my nostrils. That was sweet of my mom—to make my favorite breakfast on my return trip and not freak out that I’d been gone so long.
There was a knock on my door. “Wake up, sleepyhead. Time for your last day of fifth grade.”
I bolted straight up. “What the…” I laughed to myself. It was all a dream, but it felt so real… and weird.
I went to get my clothes off the dresser—and stopped dead in my tracks.
There was my crown.

